Diana.nu

I am in love with the way this joke is received.

No one knows why it’s a joke! No one gets it. But they accept that it’s a joke. A joke they don’t get.

Here’s another good one: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on, and sleep in?

A toothbrush, a chair, and a bed.

HAH!

Trying to read a book lately feels like an intense exercise that I just can’t do. Is there physical therapy for the mind?

I can feel the heat closing in, feel them out there making their moves, setting up their devil doll stool pigeons, crooning over my spoon and dropper I throw away at Washington Square Station, vault a turnstile and two flights down the iron stairs, catch an uptown A train…

That’s from Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs

The process

1. Okay, he can feel some kind of heat closing in.
2. Someone is making moves. I don’t get it. I’ll just skip over it.
3. What the hell is a devil doll stool pigeon? Is that figurative?
4. “Crooning” sounds familiar. I should know what that means.
5. Holy Christ, that’s a lot of things. What did he do? He threw a spoon and dropper away. This book is about drugs. Is that a drug thing? Then he vaulted a turnstile. That means he jumped it, right? What are iron stairs? Is that literal? And then he caught a train.
6. What did that all mean? What’s the mood? What’s the tone?
7. Wait, what did I just read?

Each word feels solitary. I have lost the ability to understand connotations. I can’t pause at commas. I pause too much at each word.

This really depresses me. I’m going to try to read a familiar book. Maybe that will be like physical therapy.

I used to love reading. I feel like I’ve lost my first love. Like we have to go our separate ways now. And I have to accept it. But I don’t want to. I want to read again.

This really depresses me.

My best friend is moving to Texas. He is my best friend. I tell him that, but I say it as an acronym, so it looks kind of like a filler word.

Anyway, he’s moving to Texas, and I have been working very hard on his going away gift. I can’t say what it is, because he’s here sometimes, and he’ll just have to deal with the suspense. As it should be. But I will totally brag and quote one person that does know.

“That is quite possibly one of the coolest and most original gifts I have ever seen.”

Yeah! Oh, he’ll love it. It’s really, really simple, but it’s got layers to it. And it won’t work until New Year’s Day. That’s just how it is. Can’t change that. The gift will probably wear him out quickly, but I hope he keeps it.

Actually, he might not like parts of it, but he’ll like it overall. It’s not something he can ignore either, I think.

It sounds like one of those things, on TV shows, where they conceal what they’re talking about, but they describe it and it’s completely amazingly random. And even though you know no such thing could exist, it’s infuriating that you can’t see it.

I hope he likes it~